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Calm Before The Storm ... Yeah, Right!

Calm Before The Storm ... Yeah, Right!

No NFL today? No problem, we've got plenty to talk about

Cooter Doodle
September 06, 2025

Sundays are for tinkering with your lineups and panicking over every flex player on your roster. But Saturdays? Saturdays are the calm before the storm. It's a time to sit quietly and mentally prepare for the day ahead.

Except … This Saturday, I'm not calm at all. In fact, an internal storm has already begun to swirl inside of me. All it took was 48 hours of real-life football.

Saturday Night’s Alright for …

So much for peace and tranquility. Here's my Saturday Morning Sh*t List:

Javonte Williams managers are on my sh*t list. Two touchdowns?? Really? This is a guy who was consistently drafted outside of the top-100 picks! So, yes. I'm jealous. I only spent all offseason trying to draft guys who could outperform their ADP. And missing out on the first player to catch fire? It f*cking burns. But there's more lightning to be found in other bottles, I suppose. I just need to be patient. It's only Week 1, after all. There's still time for Ollie Gordon…

Kyle Shanahan is on my sh*t list. Let me get this straight, Mr. Shanahan. On Thursday, CMC was suddenly listed as “limited.” Friday morning, CMC was seen working off to the side at practice. And then on Friday afternoon, it’s reported that CMC is considered “questionable” for Sunday’s game?! Look, I understand the coaching staff wanting to play it safe with one of the most talented players on their roster (especially after all of the health blows to their WR corps). But just give it to me straight, Kyle!! The last time we did this song and dance I had to keep CMC on my bench for a total of 13 weeks. (I have a few more words I’d like to say, but the editors have me on a strict asterisks diet.)

Thursday Night Football is on my sh*t list. Are we really going to start the season off with a completely electrifying Week 1 of TNF? Spit? Ejections? Four back-to-back rushing TDs? Weather delays? A second spitter?! The most ball drops in a game since the last huge ball drop game?! COME ON! I know we can't expect the rest of TNF to live up to these expectations. But right now, my hopes are so high that any defensive stalemate just might kill me.

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Fantasy

About Last Night …

It was almost a Carnival of points down in Sao Paulo, Brazil, but there was plenty to be excited about coming out of the Chargers’ hard-fought 27-21 victory over the AFC champion Chiefs.

Justin Herbert passed for 318 yards and 3 TDs—only the fourth time in Chargers history a QB has passed for 300+ yards and 3+ TDs in the season opener—and added 32 rushing yards for 27.92 fantasy points on the night. Could this be a coming-out party for third-year WR Quentin Johnston, he of the 5-79-2 line? That was a great complement to Ladd McConkey’s 6-74-0. That outdid the great Patrick Mahomes’ own big night, as he passed for 258 yards and a score, adding a team-high 57 rushing yards and another TD. That was good for 26.02 points.

Some other stats to keep an eye on:

Isiah Pacheco and Kareem Hunt both ran the ball 5 times. Committee?
With Xavier Worthy leaving early, Hollywood Brown drew 16 targets, including this desperation grab!
Omarion Hampton ran the ball 15 times for 48 yards and saw 2 targets. Najee Harris ran the ball once for 5 yards. No LAC committee.
Keenan Allen got 10 targets for a 7-68-1 line. Not quite washed.

What else happened last night?

Fantasy

Editors’ Picks

Who said anything about calm? We have lineups to set—make sure you’ve synced your leagues. We have rankings and projections to review so we could set those lineups. And ICYMI, check out these articles to help you in Week 1:

Week 1 Risers/Fallers

The arrow is pointing up for Trevor Lawrence and down for Justin Fields. Dwain McFarland went through the players going up and down his rankings.

Smash Jeudy, Stash Chig

Yes, we all have the sure-fire starts we have to make weekly. Mark Drumheller goes deeper with not-so-obvious smash plays and a few players to stash for later.

Slow Start for Jeanty?

Ashton Jeanty is supposed to be different from other rookies who start their careers slowly, but is he? Matthew Freedman makes several bold predictions that cannot be ignored.

Fantasy

Rankings Last Looks: What to do with 49ers backfield?

We thought we were out. But like in Godfather 3, just when we thought we were out of the Christian McCaffrey injury danger zone, they pull us back in. CMC says he “feels great,” but we’ve heard that before. We need to get ready, just in case we get pulled back in.

Chris Allen takes into account the backup scenarios in case we get the alert that McCaffrey is going to sit—Red Alert: he plays in the 4 p.m. ET window—and what it would do to the rankings. But it doesn’t stop with the 49ers, as various other position groups on different teams get another once-over in this last look at the rankings.⤵️

Fantasy

Start/Sit: Darnell Mooney to the …

Bart Simpson built an iconic franchise on phrases like, “Cool your Jets, Man!” How about building a Week 1 fantasy football strategy completely on sitting all your Jets? You have come to the right place—though if you need more help after reading this article, we have a start/sit tool that will come in handy.

John Laghezza and Coach Gene Clemons are back for another year of weekly features on Start ‘Em, Sit ‘Em, and the Week 1 installment does not disappoint. We have analytics-driven recommendations and bold takes, and everything in between. There’s an underrated WR and a second-year TE who could pop this week. We even have a rookie speedster to start, and another rook taking in the Top 10 who should ride the pine on your roster. If you’re on the fence on some players, read on. ⬇️

Fantasy

One of These Calls is Really the Pitts

OK, I lied a little in the intro. Saturdays are also for constructing the most insanely fun parlays to get us through the weekend. Live a little!

Stick it to the man (read: the 22 teams that voted to ban the Tush Push) with a nine-leg parlay.
Forget “blood brothers.” Let’s be “sweat brothers.” Root for Anytime Touchdowns from some of your favorite analysts’ favorite players.
Or maybe you just want to watch chaos unfold? Sure, we didn’t draft Kyle Pitts … But what if he scored in Week 1 … Twice??

Like my father’s daughter always says: Scared money don’t make money, baby!!